Halfway

I'm stuck in airport purgatory; the great in-between.  I am halfway between the life I live in America and the life I will lead for the next 9 months.  Lucky for me, I lost my passport and am now given ample time (while they process a new passport for me) to think about and process my transition in the literal sense as well as in the not so literal.  I am literally moving to Kenya and my stop here in Amsterdam is literally halfway.  This is a pretty cool airport as airports go.  If I have to be stuck anywhere for a nice long time, at least it's here and not say, the Reno airport.  


Not so literally, I am stuck emotionally somewhere between sad and excited.  Sad because there are a lot of people that I already miss terribly. The guy on the plane, Joe, was great though!! Every time I started to cry he just cracked a joke and asked if I wanted to watch another movie!  Then we made fun of them the whole time, it was so much fun!  I'm excited because, well, I'm going to Kenya to do the work I've been wanting to do my whole darn life! But today, mostly sad.  I'm also stuck somewhere between tired and awake.  I mean it's almost noon here, but I've been awake for a solid 18 hours at least by now.  So it feels like I should be awake, but I'm also pretty tired from this crazy day. 


As my other seat-mate was telling me, I need to live in the moment and feel what I'm feeling right now.  I don't get to have this experience over again and I need to be halfway and enjoy it! The great in-between can be such a great place if I could only learn to just be here, instead of trying to get there.  


Right now I am halfway to Kenya.  Emotionally halfway there, and physically halfway there.  But am I really? I feel like I'm just getting started.